I wrote a letter to ask for your permission to try moving to a new program.  I mustered all the courage, energy, emotion and I wrote it with honesty and of pure intention.  I read and re-read every word to make sure that my intention will not be misunderstood. The least you could do was to reciprocate and respond in writing whatever it is that you have to say.  But you chose to have someone talk to me about it instead.  You opted to send a messenger to deliver your piece. How sure are you that they gave justice to it?

I was ready for the bad news.  No matter how high my hopes were, I knew that the chances were slim.  We talked about it the last time we were on the phone discussing options. Why did I trouble myself writing? Maybe because I wanted to see about passing through that slim chance I have.  If it fails, like what I eventually found out, I knew for a fact that I tried and I wouldn’t wonder what could have happened if I didn’t.

Gathering what was relayed to me, you preferred to send a message rather than responding in writing because you didn’t want to be misunderstood. Well let me give you a feedback.  Let’s see if I took your message the way you intended it to be…

[1] There was an issue with me asking for permission to move because someone else we both know already asked a similar if not identical request. You do not want to cause alarm to the general population as a result of two consecutive instances of moving out.  My take? You doubted my ability to handle confidential matters. Integrity is one of the values I treasure.  I know when to keep things to myself.

[2] You asked me to wait for a month before trying to asked for it. Waiting is not a problem.  I can wait.  Have you asked yourself why I am requesting to be transferred now?  Surprise! Because there is an opportunity dangling right before my eyes! What am I suppose to do? Ask the “dangling opportunity” to wait for a month? It doesn’t make sense! Does it? Enlighten me, please!

I am disappointed.  My high hopes fell and I’m picking all the pieces. But more than being rejected I am sad because I did not get the same sense of professionalism I was expecting from someone in your position. I am deeply saddened by the way you handled my request.  Honestly, I was expecting something better…

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